


Primavera

by officialmaknae



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Royalty, Angst with a Happy Ending, Eventual Smut, M/M, Mutual Pining, No Dialogue, One Shot, Step-Sibling Incest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-28
Updated: 2015-05-28
Packaged: 2018-07-18 22:55:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7333981
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/officialmaknae/pseuds/officialmaknae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Baekhyun is the darling prince of Korea, suffering from the horrible loss of his mother at the age of fifteen. His father, knowing Korea can't be properly lead without the loving touch of a Queen, remarries. Baekhyun loves his stepmother, and is a bit more fond of his stepbrother than he should be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Primavera

**Author's Note:**

> Cross-posted from AsianFanFics: http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/959621/

Baekhyun had been trained from a young age how to walk, how to talk, how to properly and wittily flirt with someone in three different languages. He knew how to play the piano, the flute, and the violin. He could quote line after line of Shakespeare's best sonnets. But one thing, he found out, that he did not know how to do, was mourn.

It was a shame, the death of the Queen. She was loved, admired, and blessed by the people countless times a day. She was the rose in the fierce winter that guided her people on, she was the warmth in the castle when boundary lines got so blurred that talk of war broke out. She was the love of the King's life, and that love was extinguished by a brain aneurysm that stole her away in the night. When the King awoke the next moring to kiss his sleeping wife on the forehead, the blood on her pillow that had dripped from her nose was still warm.

Baekhyun, being the only child, was someone the kingdom had great pity for. He was only fifteen - still a boy with a long, happy life ahead of himself as King. He shouldn't have something so sinister fall upon his shoulders this early in life. At the Queen's funeral, there were so many flowers in the church that you could smell them from a half-mile, and Baekhyun cursed himself to sleep knowing that his mother would have rather the blooms be planted in her honor than be plucked from the ground to suffer the same fate as she. But he walked alongside his father as they lead the crowd of people to the cemetery through the snow. His father did not cry, he did not waver; he simply let Baekhyun hold onto his hand as he became something of a statue moreso than a king. It must have given him an icy projection as he mourned, but Baekhyun knew better. He was far too familiar of the sounds of his father's tears as he stood just outside the library door late at night.

If the Prince's and the King's lives were a tapesty, still being sewn, Baekhyun felt that this, this spanse of time in their existence, would be a tear, ripping through the elegant and ethereal design they had been given and prided themselves upon until this point.

They healed slowly, leaning upon each other to remind themselves of the things their beloved queen treasured the most. They began to truly see the sunrises in the morning and listen to the music in the ballroom. Baekhyun, who had once hated and dispised practicing piano, drove himself into it. His mother used to love to sit and soak in the music his fingers slowly pulled from the instrument, and now, he played until his hands were sore and the pads of his fingers ached to the touch. The more he played, the more closure he recieved. He felt like his mother could be sitting on the loveseat off to the left corner, her head tilted to the side and a knowing smile across her lips. Sometimes, when he thought of that, he had to stop playing, his hands trembling too much and his eyes too blurred to see the keys in front of him. 

He missed her dearly. 

The King did as well, more than perhaps even Baekhyun, but he knew that Korea cannot be run without a queen. Once upon a time, the thought of ruling alongside another woman made him feel sick, but that was before he knew of the terrible things life could do. A woman whom the Prince and the King were very fond of seemed to be the next in line for the throne. She had been a close friend of the former Queen, someone she had grown up with. She was there to laugh with behind closed doors when her tutor demanded ridiculous things, someone to go horseback riding in the rain with (even though it wasn't ladylike), and a friend with whom the Queen would have gladly given her life for. Baekhyun knew that she would be the woman replacing his mother's spot on the throne, but he didn't mind. He had known this woman all his life, had been looked after by her when his mother was ill, and he knew, no matter how much he wished that things were different, that she would make a true and just queen.

It was a little weird to see his father courting a woman. Not because Baekhyun doubted his father's competence in romance, but because he felt it was a bit silly. It was all but written in stone that she would be the next queen, so why didn't they exchange vows? It seemed a bit mocking of others to see his father with her sitting in the library, him caught in an explanation to her about a spot in the woods where he loved to hunt, her patiently showing him how to crochet, even though they knew he would never have a knack for it, or seeing his father's gaze slowly slip into a loving, adoring one. Maybe he was a bit bitter, but sometimes when she made a mistake, slipping when she walked or not wearing something the right color, he would laugh.

There was another matter, however, that the future queen brought about. She herself was a widow, ironic, as she was to be marrying a widower, and her husband had been killed in an accident involving a horse some years ago. Baekhyun remembered seeing her eyes red-rimmed for the first year after it had happened, his mother always being a shoulder to lean on for her friend, and he remembered how his heart reached out for her. He remembered hearing about his mother talk to her about her son, a year or two younger than her own, but he did not, however, remember ever meeting him. Their mothers had not had the time to introduce them. Baekhyun was almost always with his tutor - an older, strict woman who reminded Baekhyun of his grandmother on his father's side before she had passed away - and the other boy had his own agenda. It wasn't a secret that their mothers had wanted them to be friends, thinking that if they got along so well, so would their children, but Baekhyun was a prince, and the other boy was an earl. They were both going to grow into men with bright futures as influential people, and between their studies and their duties to their family, it had never happened. Baekhyun didn't even think he had ever caught the boy's name.

Now that the boy's mother was soon to become Baekhyun's stepmother, it was only a matter of time before they met. There would then be two princes of Korea, and Baekhyun didn't mind sharing the attention. After all, the crowd would still look to him to marry first and take over after his father stepped down as he was the oldest and the true heir to the throne. The thought of ruling Korea no longer scared him - it had been what he was preened to do every since he was a baby. Meeting the boy whom he would call "brother," did. He was worried that the boy would be something of a brat, noisy and uncooperative. He wasn't sure if he could live and study in peace if that was the case. He hoped for someone prim and polite, someone he could actually get along with. He prayed to a god he no longer believed existed for a friend in the boy that his mother had found in his mother. If he did, he thought, then life wouldn't be too awful.

It was only a few days after Baekhyun's sixteenth birthday that they first were revealed to one another. Baekhyun and his father were sitting in the garden, the days becoming warm enough for the blossoms to burst forth from their cage to kiss the sun. Baekhyun read aloud to his father from his favorite book as the King watched the wind blow through the trees and scatter petals in the air. They waited for the arrival of the future queen and her son, and Baekhyun was very tense, knowing that he was meeting someone he would be around a good portion of his time. His father had told him he sounded nervous as he read, and they both laughed, knowing why. The tension in his chest alleviated for the time being, but once the arrival of the due was announced, he felt like he was going to vomit.

The King rose to greet his subsequent wife with a kiss on each cheek, and Baekhyun hurriedly followed behind him, offering the woman a low bow as a form of respect, but she brushed it aside and kissed his forehead. Baekhyun smiled at the familiarity, but then she stepped aside to introduce her son, and Baekhyun felt like he couldn't breathe.

He was... gorgeous.

Baekhyun should have known he would be - his mother was beautiful, it would be impossible for her to produce anything less than heart-stopping - but he,  _he_  was on an entirely new level. Baekhyun didn't think he had ever seen a boy so handsome in his entire life. He was tall for his age, taller than his soon-to-be brother, with broad shoulders. He was thin, but appeared to be very healthy, with a pink tinge to his cheeks that radiated life. His dark hair must have been made from the finest silk in all of the world, wound up into tresses and messily styled as if to beg you to touch it. His face still held a slight roundess to his cheeks, but after all, he was only fourteen. Baekhyun knew that, given a few years, he would be unstoppably gorgeous. Not that he wasn't now, but Baekhyun felt that if he let himself view the boy as a man that he would have thoughts he didn't know if he wanted to stop.

_S e h u n_.

That was the boy's name. Sehun. Baekhyun felt a rush in his chest when he said it, smiling, and he wondered if Sehun had been as nervous a few minutes ago as he was. They sat back down in the garden, Sehun beside the pureblooded Prince, and Baekhyun tried to not let his presence distract him from his reading as he kept narrating the words for his father, and now, for his future mother and brother. He was painfully aware of Sehun watching him as he spoke, the bit of tongue that crept out to wet his lips when they got too dry, and then he would lose track of what line he was on and his father would make him start over with a laugh. When his father decided that they had read enough for the day, he stood, suggesting that Baekhyun and Sehun should spend some time together. Sehun's mother agreed wholeheartedly, and Baekhyun could almost see the hope in her that they would one day be friends burning in her eyes, so he smiled at the idea. His father escourted his bride out of the garden, leaving the teenagers to their own devices.

Sehun was the first to speak, asking if Baekhyun's tutor was as harsh as his, and Baekhyun fell into a story on how his had made him actually walk with a stack of books on his head until she deemed that his posture was fit for a prince. Sehun listened attentively, and Baekhyun learned that though he was skilled in practical arts - like literature, language, and rhetoric - his heart truly lied with things of a more physical nature. He loved to duel and fence, and he never passed up an opportunity to go riding horses. He didn't have an aptitude for any instruments, but he said that his mother reassured him that his voice more than made up for it. Baekhyun laughed at this, part of him relishing that he was good in something that this angel sent from Heaven wasn't. It made him feel better about himself.

Sehun, in return, asked what Baekhyun was interested in, and he told him openly. He talked about how he would sit and play the piano for hours, though he could play several different instruments, and they compared what languages they knew. Sehun was fluent in Japanese and German along with his native Korean; Baekhyun knew Japanese as well, but in place of German, his tutor had taught him French. They exchanged a few witty lines of banter in their mutual language, poking jokes at each other as though they had met before.

It was hard for Baekhyun to believe that someone so mature was still so young. Sehun's face was carefree, smiling easily to reveal perfect teeth, and it was contagious. Baekhyun swore that his laugh was the most perfect thing he had heard in all of his sixteen years. But when Sehun would meet his eyes, the face of a young boy was somehow reflected to show someone well beyong their years. The warm mahogany color would show him an occasional glimpse of pain, and Baekhyun guessed that losing a parent was something you never really got over. It had only been a few short months since Baekhyun had lost his mother, and he wondered if his eyes showed Sehun things he didn't want them to see. After all, if he could still see how Sehun missed his father after so long, what would a fresh victim's eyes look like?

The sun started to slope downward into the mountains on the horizon and Sehun stood, offering Baekhyun his arm and suggesting they join their parents in the sitting room before it got too cold. He took the arm, noticing that despite his slender frame, Sehun had muscle underneath his royal attire. He only came to around Sehun's shoulder, too, which made him feel small, but not in a bad way. Sehun made him feel safe, and as they talked while they walked back towards the door to enter the side of the castle, Baekhyun thought that maybe having a stepbrother wouldn't be all that bad.

A month later, when the flowers really started to bloom and the country became alive again, Sehun's mother was wed and crowned Queen. The citizens attending called blessings upon the union as the crown was placed upon her head. Sehun had a part in the ceremony as well, and he knelt before Baekhyun as he placed a silver crown - identical to his own - on his brother's head. His fingers brushed against the soft hair and he wanted to drop the crown and give in to his wish to run his fingers through it, but he knew that was something that couldn't happen. Sehun looked him in the eyes as he crowned him, giving him a small smile, and Baekhyun felt his heart speed up, a flush taking over his cheeks, but then the hall burst out in applause and he breathed a sigh of relief when everyone's eyes weren't on him anymore. His father's eyes shone with approval at his son, and he smiled throughout the celebration alongside his new wife, but Baekhyun knew, when he found his father sitting on the balcony outside of the ballroom later that night, tears in his eyes as his son sat beside him and laid his head on his shoulder, that he missed his mother, too, and that no amount of words or wishes of happiness could change that.

Sehun and his mother were received exceedingly well, which pleased Baekhyun and his father. They were hoping that the people wouldn't oppose the King for remarrying, and it seemed that none of them did. Sehun's mother proved herself to be an excellent queen and a loving mother to both Baekhyun and Sehun, making sure that as they grew older that they bloomed into capable young men. They spent a lot of time together, choosing to rather than it being by circumstance. It pleased Sehun's mother to see the boys bonding like they did, knowing it would make Baekhyun's mother smile if she could see them laughing as they rode horses together, as Baekhyun beat Sehun mercilessly in chess, or as Sehun taught Baekhyun how to fence. They interacted so well it was like they were two sides of the same coin.

The first Christmas they were together, Sehun and Baekhyun went sledding. Baekhyun had never done it before, and Sehun was thrilled to tell him all about the times he'd crashed as they trudged up the hill, Sehun pulling the sled behind him as they walked. When he showed hesitance to partake, Sehun reassured Baekhyun that the snow was thick enough to cushion a fall if he was thrown off. He was still worried, so when they got on the sled, Sehun made Baekhyun sit in front of him, fastening his arms firmly around his slim waist before Sehun, using his long legs, kicked them off. Baekhyun was instantly addicted to the rush of speeding downhill, laughing so hard he couldn't keep his eyes open. He made Sehun pull the sled back up the slope again and again, but he didn't seem to mind. They came back to the castle after dark with red ears and noses, snow dabbled in their hair.

Baekhyun still played the piano often, showing Sehun how quickly and fluidly he could make his fingers slide across the keys to create a myriad of sounds of which Sehun had never heard. He attempted to teach Sehun how to play, sitting beside him on the stool and demonstrating what notes to play before having Sehun copy. He learned that it was a lack of patience to which Sehun could credit his inability to play rather that a lack of an aptitude for it. He was easily frustrated when the keys he pressed didn't produce the sounds he wanted, so Baekhyun told him to sing for him instead. Sehun was taken aback, seemingly shocked that Baekhyun had remembered, but it wasn't like he couldn't notice. Sehun hummed absent-mindedly when he was concentrating, and when it was something especially difficult, he would sing under his breath. Baekhyun learned that his voice was something he preferred to hear out loud when he sang, not something kept quiet.

On Sehun's sixteenth birthday, his mother made a passing comment at dinner that she should start setting him up with compatible bachelorettes in the kingdom. Baekhyun froze. Sehun's mother laughed at her own joke, and the King chuckled along with her, but Sehun and Baekhyun glanced at each other, too scared to make eye contact. It was something Baekhyun had known was coming, even if they weren't able to marry until they turned eighteen. Luckily enough, he had been able to hold off his father with the idea of marriage, thinking that his father knew he didn't want to marry someone out of pressure, that he wanted to marry a person he truly loved and cared for. Like his father and mother had.

Sehun's mother had a different view, tearing away Baekhyun's hope that she was kidding about what she said. Sehun started spending less and less time with Baekhyun, going to dates and meetings that his mother set up for him. He had tried to tell her that he didn't want to go on them, that he didn't want to spend his time as a teenager trying to get into a marriage that would most likely be full of coldness and hate, but she didn't listen. When he could get time with Baekhyun, Baekhyun was moody, not wanting to say much. His own birthday was coming up soon, and he feared that the Queen would get on him, too, since it would be his eighteenth. He started to dread his birthday, terrified that he was going to spend his life with someone that wasn't  _Sehun_.

His own attraction to Sehun made him sick. It was one thing to want to be with someone, but it was another if it was your stepbrother. He knew he shouldn't feel the way he did, and the time he had spent with him only made it worse. He had memorized every line to Sehun's face, every attribute that made Sehun who he was. He loved how Sehun asked for Baekhyun's help when he didn't understand something in his studies, how he always made Baekhyun laugh when he didn't feel like it, taught Baekhyun to shut up about his emotions. Maybe it was best if Baekhyun  _did_ marry someone else. Perhaps then, he could move away with his spouse and have a peace of mind. But is that what he really wanted?

There was a ball to take place on the night of his birthday, and, to Baekhyun's disdain, every eligible bachelor and bachelorette was to attend. Sehun's mother felt it would be nice to have a bit of flavor in it though, so she decided that everyone was to wear a mask. Hoping to stump her, Baekhyun asked how they would know it was the Prince they were talking to, and with a shrug, she replied that he could wear his crown. Every word she spoke drove another spike into his coffin. As the days drew closer to the celebration, Baekhyun became increasingly absent. He would keep himself in his room, torn between his emotions. He was scared of what he might do in his desperate haze to get control. He decided to not put himself in any situation that could jeopardize his ego, keeping himself busy in his studies.

The day before his birthday, Sehun knocked on his door, asking him to come out. His heart leapt in his throat, thinking that maybe he should spill his guts to Sehun. He knew him better than anyone. He had to understand, at the very least. He felt that if he didn't tell him he was going to explode. He opened the door, trying to piece together the words, when he realized that Sehun wasn't the only person waiting for him outside. Sehun's mother smiled at him from beside her son, telling him that he needed to learn how to dance in order to keep up his reputation. Baekhyun felt bad for wanting slap her across the face and tell her to leave him be. He knew she was only doing what she thought was best. So he followed them into the ballroom and let her teach him how to lead a proper waltz, Sehun watching them the whole time. Baekhyun felt like he was drowning in the music for the first time in his life, unable to command it. Instead, it commanded him, and Sehun's mother told him so, telling him that he was a prince, and that princes don't take orders from anyone. He held up an air of superiority long enough for her to agree he would do well enough at the ball. She beamed with pride at his progress, holding his face in her warm hands, and Baekhyun didn't know how he was able to keep any ill thoughts towards this woman that cared for him so deeply. When she left, he covered his face in his hands and shook as he tried to keep tears back.

Strong, sure arms wrapped around him, pulling him into a chest he was so familiar with that he knew it better than his own. The smell of Sehun filled his nose and he lost it, sobbing into his chest. Sehun rubbed his hands on his back, resting his chin on his head. Baekhyun knew he should pull away from the embrace, it was just a more conscious reminder of what he couldn't have, but he didn't have the strength to make himself. If he had to choose between being able to breathe and being in Sehun's arms, there was no uncertainty which one he would choose. And that scared him. That scared him more than a long drop, more than the time he thought about living his life without his mother, more than the moments before he had met Sehun. Everything was scary now, and he didn't know if he could be brave anymore.

As he was getting dressed the next night, his father interrupted him. He brought a box, and inside the box, was the mask Baekhyun was to wear. It was a simple white, outlined in what seemed to be scarlet paint. It tied around his head and covered the area from the middle of his forehead to the center of his cheeks. When he looked in the mirror, he was very much recognizable, even without the crown on his head. His father reached out and placed a hand on his shoulder, telling him how proud he was of the man he had become. He talked about how his mother would be proud, too, and Baekhyun looked away from his father's eyes in the reflection before he could see the tears. The King said that he hoped Baekhyun would make the most of the night he could, hopeful he would find someone he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. Baekhyun wished for that too, but he knew he wouldn't. He knew he couldn't ask for something he already had.

There must have been over three hundred people inside the ballroom. He kept being stopped and wished a happy birthday, and he graciously told everyone thank you and thanked them for coming. He probably would have recognized some of the people that talked to him if it wasn't for the masks. He danced with nearly everyone, it felt like. The women were nice and the men were charming, but Baekhyun didn't feel anything close to what he had hoped for. 

A hand suddenly grasped his wrist, pulling him away from the crowds and down a corridor. Baekhyun looked around to see who was assaulting him, but one look from the man's eyes silenced him. He already knew who it was, and he thought to himself that this was oh, so very, _very_ bad. He led Baekhyun around to the other side of the castle to make sure that no one would find them, before pushing him against a wall in the hallway and removing the mask from his face. Baekhyun felt the last drain of hope of finding anyone else,  _ever_ , leave his mind as Sehun's face became unobstructed in front of him. Baekhyun let him remove his own mask, the material falling from his hands and onto the floor as Sehun tilted his face upwards. Baekhyun felt his will slipping, begging Sehun to let him go back to the party, but Sehun silenced him with a kiss.

Baekhyun had never been kissed before, and nothing he had experienced until his point prepared him for it. Sehun's lips were soft and plush against his own, his eyes fluttering into the back of his head as he thought that he had never known bliss until this moment. He was painfully aware of Sehun's presence at that point; he could smell him, he could taste him, he could feel his hand press against his lower back and push him closer. He didn't want to stop kissing Sehun, wanting this to last forever, and when Sehun pulled away, there were tears in Baekhyun's eyes. Sehun opened his mouth to say something, then it closed, and he opened it again as he tried to find the right words.

_I ' m  s o r r y._

Sorry? Why was he sorry? But then he backed away, and turned to walk back towards the party. Baekhyun thought he saw Sehun wipe at his face before he turned down another hallway.

He didn't have the strength to move. He didn't have the strength to stand, either, and he slipped down the wall to sit with his knees in front of him. He picked up his mask, running his fingers along the patterns of paint. He had been given everything in a single second, but it had been taken away in the next. This must be Hell. No, this had to be worse than Hell. If there even was a Hell, and at this point, if there was a God, Baekhyun hated him for what position he had put him in, for putting his soulmate in his life in such difficult cirsumstances. What had he done in a past life to deserve this purgatory? No one, not even the souls that had committed murder, deserved this kind of suffering, surely.

He sucked in a deep, rattling breath, thinking he would rather be dead.

The moment seemed to not affect Sehun at all, however. The next morning at breakfast, Sehun didn't so much as cast a glance his way, and each time Baekhun looked at him, it was like another knife was being plunged into the already-gaping hole in his chest. His father commented on how he looked sick, and his wife offered that maybe he had been up a bit too late last night, which Baekhyun adopted a smile in response to, nodding his head. It wasn't a lie. He couldn't make his head be quiet with the replaying of the kiss, which simultaneously made him want to jump and vomit at the same time. He didn't know what kind of a person could make him feel like that with just one kiss.

The days seemed to grow longer and less beautiful the more Sehun neglected Baekhyun with attention. Baekhyun and Sehun rarely had any time together nowadays, but when they happened to be in the same room - by circumstance, no longer by choice - they treated each other like strangers. Now, they were both so busy meeting people and testing out relationships they hardly had any time to do anything but eat and sleep. Baekhyun felt that maybe this was for the best. If they pretended like nothing had happened, then perhaps he could convince himself that nothing did. Be that as it may, their parents noticed, and it pained Sehun's mother to see the boys, who had once not been able to go on without the other, so painfully polite to each other.

A man eventually took a liking to Baekhyun, asking to court him properly. He was nice enough, always treating Baekyun with respect and kindness. They had a lot in common, ranging from their taste in literature to their favorite kinds of flowers. Baekhyun genuinely liked Jongin, but he knew it would never go beyong a platonic friendship from his side. Despite his lack of emotional attachment to him, when Jongin kissed Baekhyun for the first time on New Year's, he didn't back away. It felt nice to kiss Jongin, but it didn't even begin to compare to what it felt like to kiss Sehun, which annoyed Baekhyun endlessly. Once he had openly announced to his parents that Jongin and him were officially courting, his relationship with Sehun went from polite at a distance to seething. Sehun now only cast him dark looks, making Baekhyun's stomach twist up into knots whenever he was around. Baekhyun knew he would feel the same way in Sehun's shoes, but he was older than Sehun, so he understood that sometimes you can't have what you want. This, unfortunately, was one of those circumstances, and he couldn't change it.

When Sehun turned seventeen, he asked to visit his aunt and uncle in a neighboring province for a month. Baekhyun, upon hearing the news that his request had been granted, was struck dumb. He rushed out of the castle just quick enough to see Sehun hugging his mother goodbye before he mounted his horse. For a split second, their eyes met, but it was like dinner on his sixteenth birthday all over again, and they felt that if they looked at one another too long, it would ruin it. But with that one instant, it felt as though they had come to an agreement, and Baekhyun stood with the Queen as she waved at Sehun's figure until you could no longer see it.

The castle no longer felt like home without Sehun. It was true they had barely said anyting to one another in almost a year, but that didn't matter. Sehun was always there, always there to rely upon to shoot a crippling glare, and without him, it felt like Baekhyun had been torn into pieces. The table at mealtimes was empty, though Sehun rarely said anything at them anyway. The fencing room was painfully quiet. The horses even seemed to notice his absence, and Baekhyun took it upon himself to spend time with them since Sehun wasn't there to do it. He found himself counting the days until Sehun returned, sometimes standing outside of his bedroom door, hoping that he would walk out. Sometimes he pictured him doing it, giving him a dirty look, other times, making a joke about stalking him. It didn't matter what he said or did in Baekhyun's head, because at least he was there, and that was the only thing that he needed to know for this place to feel like a home again.

Jongin noticed the effect Sehun's trauncy had on Baekhyun, and he tried his best to cheer him up. He let Baekhyun beat him at chess, even though he was a master at it, but that didn't help at all. He bought him books of new songs to play on the piano, but that only made him spend more time away from him as he committed them to memory in the music room. Jongin felt that his presence wasn't helping him, and that if he overwhelmed him, it would get on his nerves, so he mainly let him be. Baekhyun was so caught up in his distress that on his birthday, he had to be reminded what day it was and the significance of it. When he realized, he just shrugged it off, saying that he didn't see why it mattered. It was his nineteenth birthday; it wasn't a day that was of extreme importance, like it was last year, when he became an adult. The reminder of last year only really tore him down even more, acutely conscious of the fact that last year, on this day, was the day Sehun kissed him, and it was both the worst and best day of his life.

On the day that Sehun was set to return, Baekhyun couldn't sit still. He didn't know why he was letting the arrival of him get under his skin so much; it wasn't like anything had changed. The Queen was overjoyed with the return of her son, though, and she called for a huge celebration, telling the cooks to make the most magificent feast they had ever created, and when dinner time came around, even the maids and servants were tittering with the excitement of Sehun's return. When his group of guards was spotted, a large commotion went through the castle, and Baekhyun found himself waiting on the balcony with the King and Queen to greet him. Baekhyun was reminded of the day he met Sehun, the feeling like he was going to vomit also making its return. He didn't know if he was ready to see Sehun again. He undoubtedly wanted to, but he knew nothing had changed between them, and he wasn't sure if he wanted to go back to the way things were before he left: ignoring each other's presence until absolutely necessary.

When Sehun slid off of his horse and stepped into the light coming from the windows of the castle, Baekhyun held back the urge to gasp.

_He had changed so much_.

He seemed to have grown a few inches, his shoulders becoming even more broad. His arms held more definition, his muslces flexing and unflexing as he helped the servants get the stuff from his satchel. The remaining baby fat that had once clung to his face at fourteen was completely erased and Baekhyun was now aware that Sehun was a man. He was not the boy that had come into his life a few years ago; he was now someone that could very possibly grow into a great, powerful leader for Korea, and Baekhyun felt a surge of pride at that. The three of them all went down to the entrance hall to meet him, Baekhyun trying to keep himself from passing out. He felt like it was all too much.

Then Sehun was coming throuh the front doors and straight into his mother's arms, where she was almost crying with joy from having her son back. The King embraced him as well, though for a shorter amount of him, and when they stepped back, he patted Sehun firmly on the shoulder, nodding his head. And then Sehun's eyes fell on Baekhyun. Baekhyun took a hesitant step forward, and that was all it took for Sehun to close the distance between them, wrapping his arms around Baekhyun like he hadn't in a long time, sweeping him into the air with the force of it. Baekhyun felt himself want to cry at the relief that washed over him of being near his brother again, and he also wanted to cry at how perfectly they fit together like this. He breathed in the smell of Sehun, shaking with the comfort it gave him. Baekhyun whispered in his ear that he had missed him, and Sehun breathed it back before they pulled away.

At dinner, the Queen invited even the maids and butlers to sit with them, bragging on how lovely both of her boys were, how overjoyed she was that she had them both back home. Baekhyun noticed that she was drinking rather heavily on the wine, and due to that, she retired early, but not before she kissed Baekhyun and Sehun on the forehead and told them how much she loved them. The King, noticing how wobbly her steps were, retired along with her, mainly to make sure she made it to bed alright. When Baekhyun began to feel sleepy, he excused himself, followed by Sehun. They walked together to the upper levels of the castle, not speaking. Their rooms were across from each other - making it easy for them to have sleepovers when they were smaller - and when Baekhyun said goodnight and turned to go into his room, Sehun asked if he could come in.

Baekhyun looked at him curiously, but nodded, pushing the door further open and then closing it when they were both inside. Sehun walked around his bedroom, observing as though he hadn't been in there a million times before. Sehun then stopped, turning to look at his brother, who was sitting on the edge of the bed and watching him. He sucked on his bottom lip as he thought of something to say, but Baekhyun helped him with that, noting how much he had changed since he had left. Sehun laughed at this, talking of how his aunt and uncle run a training facility for knights, so he was always on his feet and doing something productive. Then they fell into their old banter, how it had been before things had gotten tense between them. Baekhyun felt safe by his presence again, and he wasn't afraid that he was going to say or do anything wrong that would turn Sehun against him. After a half hour of catching up, Sehun said goodnight, but before he left, he turned towards Baekhyun, giving him the same small smile he had when Baekhyun had crowned him as the second Prince of Korea. It still had the same effect on him, making his heart speed up in his chest, and Baekhyun could barely keep it steady as he tried to fall asleep

The next morning, Sehun was at his door, asking him if he wanted to fence with him before they had breakfast. Baekhyun accepted the challenge, thrilled to have something to do. Baekhyun was a decent fencer, more skilled than most, but Sehun's labor while he had been away refined him into something quick and more precise than Baekhyun had ever seen. He slaughtered Baekhyun, who was dumbstruck at the skill Sehun had managed to harness in a short amount of time. They talked about it on their way to breakfast, but a maid caught up to them, telling Baekhyun he had a visitor. Baekhyun made his way to the sitting room alone; he told Sehun to go to breakfast without him.

Jongin stood to greet his boyfriend, kissing his cheek and embracing him. Baekhyun smiled at the affection, but felt a jolt in his chest. He told himself that he was going to have to get used to it if he was going to marry Jongin one day, and that thought in itself made him want to recoil. Not that he didn't value Jongin's company, he did, very much so, but he felt as though he was being unfair to him. He wasn't in love with him, and he knew that he was never going to  _be_  in love with him, and if the pursuit of courting someone isn't love, then what was the point? But then Baekhyun realized that he wasn't in a normal situation. If Sehun had been anyone but his stepbrother, then they would have a chance at a proper courting, but he wasn't, so they didn't, and this was the road that Baekhyun had to take.

Jongin asked Baekhyun if he would like to go horseback riding with him after breakfast, and before Baekhyun could answer, Sehun walked into the room. Jongin caught sight of him and his proposal hung in the air. Baekhyun looked between the both of them awkwardly, not knowing what to say. Jongin finally offered Sehun a low bow, greeting him and welcoming him back from his trip, but Baekhyun noticed that he was now more reserved. Jongin looked back at Baekhyun, withdrawing the offer and saying that he must want to spend some time with his brother after not seeing him for so long. The icy tone in Jongin's voice was something unlike anything Baekhyun had heard from his lips before, let alone directed towards him. He excused himself, leaving the brothers standing there alone in the sitting room.

As the months passed, Baekhyun found it increasingly difficult to balance his time between Sehun, Jongin, and his studies. He knew he should be focusing on Jongin, but he was slowly turning into someone that Baekhyun wasn't sure he wanted to be with anymore. His once gentle affections had become routine, leaving where he touched cold. He spoke rashly with Baekhyun on occasion, but seconds afterwards he always apologized, sincerity dripping from his words, and Baekhyun would forgive him. Late one summer evening, Jongin was walking with Baekhyun in the garden, their hands clasped together as they listened to the sounds of insects and felt the warm breeze. Jongin stopped walking and pulled Baekhyun to him, kissing him with all the fervor he had; he hadn't kissed Baekhyun like this in a long time, and it sparked hope in Baekhyun that maybe his Jongin was coming back, the one that he would have silly debates with over favorite literary characters, the Jongin that left him flowers in his books for him to find the next day, and Baekhyun smiled into the kiss. When he pulled away, Jongin stroked his cheek, looking at Baekhyun adoringly.

_M a r r y  m e._

Baekhyun's eyes widened, his feet taking an automatic step back. Jongin stepped forward to correct the distance, his face forming into a mask of concern. Of course, Baekhyun had thought about marrying Jongin, and had decided that eventually he would, but was eventually  _now_? Surely it couldn't be now, he was only nineteen, he had so much stuff to do before he got married and became king. And then he thought.

Eventually might not be now, it might not be tomorrow, it might not be in the next year, but whenever it happened, whenever he was going to have to settle down and marry someone, he knew he wasn't going to be ready because he wasn't ready to sacrifice his happiness in order to become ruler of a country. The selfishness of the thought made him want to hurt himself - he had been bred to lead Korea - but he was a human that had feelings and emotions, emotions that ran way too high and were not stable. He couldn't give himself away like this.

Baekhyun looked up at Jongin, and Jongin knew the answer before he said it. He cast a glance at the castle and made a comment about being a better fuck than his brother. Rage filled Baekhyun like he had never felt before, and he pulled his hand back before he slapped Jongin hard across the face. Jongin was thrown back by the force of it, and he when looked back towards Baekhyun, there was a trickle of blood running from his top lip. He wiped it away with his thumb, looking at it before lunging towards Baekhyun. He threw him to the ground, forcing his arms down and his hands around his throat. Baekhyun didn't stop struggling, but he felt the air leaving him, his vision started to swim.

Then he was sucking in deep gulps of air as the pressure on his throat left and he blinked, the world around him spinning. He sat up, trying to see what was going on. A figure had wrestled Jongin to the ground, punching him repeatedly in the face. Baekhyun recognized the figure as Sehun and leapt up, pulling at his shirt and screaming at him to stop. At the sound of Baekhyun in distress, he quit, pulling Jongin up by his collar and looking him dead in the face. He pushed him towards the gate, telling him to never come back, threatening to have him beheaded for attacking a prince.

Baekhyun looked at Sehun, somewhat angry at him for beating Jongin up, but he knew that if he hadn't come and intervened that Baekhyun could be unconscious by now. He also felt relieved because now everything between him and Jongin was over, but that rose another wave of frustration out of him. Completely forgetting his determination from earlier, he shook his head as he thought about how he was going to find someone else to settle down with. Sehun rolled his eyes, as if knowing what was going through his head. Sehun asked him if he was stupid.

Baekhyun's eyes narrowed at him, offended, and he started screaming at him. He got all of his anger out, asking Sehun if  _he_  was stupid. He had a perfectly good man to settle down with, someone to have a future with, and he ruined it. He asked him who the hell he thought he was, because you don't kiss someone on their birthday and then walk around as if it didn't happen: you ruin relationships with people like that, not start them. He started crying, completely worn out from having to keep all of this inside of him. His voice was hoarse, but he kept going. Was Sehun completely blind? Did he not see how much Sehun ignoring him hurt him? And then when he started acting like a hormonal teenager when he got a boyfriend was absolutely unjustified, because at least Baekhyun had the maturity to try and see the bigger picture rather than pursue his personal wants. He dared Sehun to say that he didn't care for him, because he did the most he could by acting like the kiss had never happened and letting it be, because he knew the Queen would have Sehun engaged the day he turned eighteen, which scared the shit out of Baekhyun because he was sure that this pathetic, worthless, sorry man was the only person he would ever love.

The second the last sentence came out, Baekhyun bit his lip, not meaning to say something like that. He stammered out an apology, looking down at the ground. Sehun swallowed, beginning to talk. He told Baekhyun the day he first saw him that he thought he was the most beautiful boy in the world. He thought that he was absolutely fucked for having someone like this as a stepbrother because he knew he was going to fall for him. When they went sledding, he gladly pulled the sled back up the hill how ever many times Baekhyun asked him to, because he would do anything to see him smile. He said that he didn't care whether the King or Queen approved, but when he turned eighteen, he wanted Baekhyun to marry him. He'd always wanted that. He said he didn't see why Korea couldn't be ruled by two kings, either. Stranger things had happened. He just wanted Baekhyun to be by his side until the day he died, and he hoped to God that he wouldn't have to see another day without seeing him, touching him, hearing him laugh, because his laughter was what he dreamt about. He was incomprehensively in love with the Prince of Korea.

Baekhyun's eyes caught his and he stepped toward Sehun. Sehun cupped his face in both of his hands, kissing him like he was the oxygen he breathed. Baekhyun didn't think Sehun was a want anymore; he was a need, like someone needs water or food. They only stopped kissing long enough to clasp hands and run like children to Sehun's room, where they immediately laid on the bed, Sehun's mouth already trailing down Baekyun's neck. He had been waiting for years to see what it would feel like to have Sehun's lips there, and it was nothing short of otherworldly. His mouth was hot, and it made Baekhyun's lower body weak with longing. Baekhyun practically ripped his shirt from his body, his eyes ready to soak in the beauty that was Sehun. His chest was firm and muscled, shaking under Baekhyun's fingertips. Sehun then undressed Baekhyun, his shirt coming off first, and then his bottoms as he kissed down his stomach. He removed his underwear and Baekhyung got red in the face, averting his eyes, but then Sehun was hovering over him, his fingers clamped on his jaw to make him look at him. He scolded Baekhyun for being abashed about himself, because he told him that if any of the great artists had seen him, their works would just be painting after painting of him. He kissed Baekhyun to cut off any argument, making him weak and he tried to remove Sehun's bottoms and underwear.

Sehun had him suck on two of his fingers before prying him open. Baekhyun let out a pained sound and Sehun wanted to stop, but Baekhyun told him to keep going. He let him adjust to the feeling of something inside of him before he began to move them, careful to try and give Baekhyun as much pleasure as he could at the moment. He moved his mouth to engulf Baekhyun's shaft, making the older arch his back and gasp. As he loosened up, Sehun pulled away and removed his fingers. He then kissed Baekhyun all the way up his jaw, rubbing the crown of his member against his opening to spread around the natural lubricant his body provided before he pushed into him.

Baekhyun felt like he was being split in two. It was a lot more unpleasant that he thought, and he was biting on his lip to keep from crying out. Sehun stayed still, murmuring how good he was doing in his ear and giving him affectionate kisses, until he noticed him getting restless. Then he slowly pulled out, leaving in only the head, before pushing back in. Baekhyun felt a little flutter of pleasure, which made his eyelids quake in gratification. He did it again, this time a bit smoother, Baekhyun started to wonder why he'd never tried sex earlier. Sehun was being so gentle, so careful with him, but there were so many years of pent up longing behind it that Baekhyun wondered how long Sehun's restraint would last. He was now started to ask Sehun for harder thrusts, which Sehun complied to, and he was rewarded with delicate moans that were unheard by ears that weren't his. Next to Baekhyun's laugh, Sehun thought it was the best sound in the world.

Baekhyun came undone first, spurting all over their chests, and when Sehun finished, he didn't pull out. Baekhyun didn't mind. He was sort of elated that Sehun finished inside of him; it let him know that Sehun was serious about what he said, because he didn't strike Baekhyun as the type of person to cum inside just anyone. It was more of an act of commitment, and it made him smile.

Sehun used his blankets to wipe the cum off of Baekhyun and his tummy, to which Baekhyun apologized, but Sehun only laughed before he crawled into his bed and pulled Baekhyun along beside him. He didn't hesitate to wrap his arms around Sehun, breathing in the scent that had fascinated him for what seemed like forever, but this time, it was pure, unadultered, and straight from the source, and it made Baekhyun's heart rate go through the roof. Sehun kissed his forehead as they talked about what they were going to do. He seemed adamant about what he had said about marrying Baekhyun after he turned eighteen, which made the older a bit nervous. What if their parents didn't like it? To which Sehun replied that they could strip him of his title and kick him out, but he would not stop trying to be with Baekhyun until he had him

Baekhyun nuzzled into Sehun's neck, finally in the place where he belonged: wrapped safely and securely in his arms. Sehun's head rested on his as he began to drift off to sleep.

_I  l o v e  y o u._

**Author's Note:**

> This is so long I honestly nearly made it a two shot, but I thought you guys could handle it. I also tried to make the smut more lovely than I normally do because this isn't a smut fic. It's a sappy romance one, which is completely not my thing, so if that absolutely sucked, I am so, so, so sorry. I also didn't have any dialogue in this, which I didn't start with the idea of. But then when I went to put in dialogue it seemed so forced and amatuer (lol like this fic already isn't) so I was like "nope, no dialogue." God. I am so tired.
> 
> Please tell me if you liked it or not in the comments! Or tell me what you're thinking right now. I just love getting comments so much; they're honestly a drug. Anyways, I hope you guys are having a good day/night, and if you're on summer break, have a great summer! If you're not on break yet, know that you get a longer summer than those that are out now, so you kinda win, you feel?


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